Three weeks later

The whole Chris finding out about Christina thing wasn’t helping me focus on my shit. I needed to get out of here ASAP but with Rob being on my ass ever since Chris brought me home the other night I couldn’t even go to school like I normally should. I already…





All my life I’ve been using my innocent look to get to where I wanted to, what I wanted even who I wanted. All I would have to do is bat my long eyelashes and flare my dimples while flashing my award-winning smile and I could get away with anything. And having the home life I had I needed my looks to get myself out of trouble.

Even though I was raised in a nice middle class Italian family, I managed find my way into trouble. If mother could see me now she’ll probably drop to the floor in tears and scream to the Virgin Mary and Jesùs himself to spare me from the sins I was committing.

¡Oh Mio Dio signore, please forgive my child for she has sinned. She has filled victim to the devil’s evil plan. Benedica il sup signore la benedica!

And for the first time in my life, I wouldn’t say she was overreacting. But my sin was too fucked up to sweep under the rug. The rush I get from being in dangerous situations was developed because I was so bored with a regular life that I had create another one, one where I’m no go. If you asked my mother, I became bad from all the rap music I was listening to.

Ariana, we came to this country to give you a better life in hopes that you would become smarter but that loud music you listen to isn’t helping at all.

I was bad because I wanted that rush that get when I just escaped danger. And ever since that day at the mall I’ve been looking for that. I wanted the fast life. Even after I had Truly I still didn’t slowed down like I should’ve. And now it has gotten me to a place where I know my innocent looks wouldn’t work, it would only make this worst. I guess my mother replaced my conscience because all  I can hear in my head is;

¡Oh, Mio Dio, get that boy from between your legs!

                “I love Ariana,” he whispered making me cringe. The places between my knees and waist were throbbing severely. A tear fell from each eye as I looked passed him and at Chris. The fact that he couldn’t even look me in the eyes made me realize it was over. The laughter from the other men in the room didn’t make it any better. I started to think about the last words that my father had to me;

Don’t mess with that Nero boy he’s no good.

The only one that wasn’t good was me. From the first time I stole to up until now it’s been all my fault. Chris was never the problem, I was.